Summer Vacation: what to do with the child, and where to find a playmate.
Summer — time, excellent in many respects. The heat don’t need to put the piles of clothes before heading out. No children’s classes and, therefore, irrelevant logistics associated with the delivery. Like, everything is easier than in another season. But to say that no difficulty no, impossible. Last time we discussed how dangerous separation mothers taking children to the country or to the sea, and the Pope, the remaining work in the city. Today let’s talk about the children and try to understand exactly what a summer vacation is best like your child?
Than to occupy the child: lack of social experiences
In the country, at sea, in the village usually we deal with a lot of impressions associated with nature. And for the child, for its development are important, of course. Most children love to swim, sunbathe, sit on the grass, watching the sun or animals. Children growing up in the city, not enough of these simple events.
But it takes a week or two, and the mother begins to notice that the baby is not so immersed in all these lovely summer classes. He may become more cranky or demanding to ask them again, as in the city, constantly engaged and entertained him.
This behavior is likely due to the fact that a child is the lack of communication with peers, and lack of social experiences, age-appropriate. Just kids-introverts feel completely self-sufficient and don’t need friends. All the rest (80%) communication with other children is necessary as air.
Many parents know it by experience of the previous summer months: if you go somewhere to relax with friends, have children of similar age, it will be easier. Yes, they certainly will from time to quarrel. But overall it will be much easier, and adults may even have time to relax and socialize.
But if this summer the company you have — is to think in advance how you will organize social (related to communication) impressions baby.
Brothers and sisters are a good company, but even friendly siblings periodically “dilute” too close a bunch. Otherwise the number of quarrels may increase.
If the baby you have one — look for neighbors, new friends, perhaps even children’s activities that summer. Having new experiences your child will have to play better myself.
Appropriate and inappropriate playmates
As you know, not everything or everyone fits. And your child doesn’t have the enthusiasm to play with any of his peers. Every child is different, and it so happens that, for example, same-sex peers can’t quite find a common language.
There is the concept of “good game a couple of” — it’s 2 children that are really perfect for each other, the game sparkles, fantasy gushes, parents can sigh with relief.
As in marriage — a combination of characters and their interaction is quite difficult to predict. Then you need to act by observing: see how your kids are playing, and draw conclusions. We should not impose the kid with whom he is not glued to the game. But if you are nice to talk with the parents of this child, nothing prevents to translate the communion rails for adults, and children may interact.
The difficult experience of contact with another child someday will be useful to your baby. Keep a distance and conflict — is also a useful social skill.
Old friend is better than two new ones?
You have arrived to the country or to the sea by the same company and you notice that those children who played very well with each other and by all appearances was an exciting couple, now unable to find a common language.
Perhaps, some of them dramatically matured, and began to walk in the garden or school or became an elder in his family. But, maybe the kids just got out of the habit — for them 9 months of winter are drawn approximately to 2.5–3 years.
Try to help them remember the friendship, make game ideas or organizing picnics and other joint activities. But if after a week the situation will not change — let things take their course. Do not insist on mandatory continuation of communication. Children, especially preschool, friendship rarely long-lasting.
Children grow too quickly and changing them is almost impossible to understand and to tell mom, why with old friends became interested. Those cases where children are playing beautifully from year to year — rather rare luck, the exception to the rule that you need to really appreciate.
Making new friends
To ensure that the child acquired new friends, sometimes it takes a few minutes, and sometimes — a few weeks. It depends on the age, circumstances, combinations of characters.
Small (3–4 years) children enough to play it once to call a new acquaintance best friend. But a shy baby of the same age a few days will only look closely and by the end of the month dare to approach.
We should not expect miracles: if you got a shy child, do not try to remake it right now. From haste and my mother’s perseverance in this case, the contact doesn’t get better, the child can only withdraw even more.
If problems with sociability you have — help your child to learn the names of new people and understand their preferences and habits. There are games that are well storevault: for example, simple dances with name-calling or simple ball game type “jacks”.
When too much communication
Sometimes it also happens that the summer period is replete with communication. In the country or on the sea getting a huge children’s and adult company, social life has over the edge, the child is almost never one on one with mom — all the time something happens, someone comes to visit or calls out.
And this situation can be difficult: communication — this is a kind of tonic substance. If it’s too much, the child perevozbujdenia, influence and educate becomes more difficult.
If your summer social life is very rapid, it is necessary to think about how to dose communication. It is necessary to appoint breaks in the common events and to be alone with a child, doing what is best for you, — to read, to talk, to lie. This will help the baby to come to normal and relax. Remember: a lot of good — also not good.
Children — lovers of chamber communication
Probably every parent knows, is his child: to the lovers of noisy groups or to a more calm conversation with 1–2 friends.
Such preferences child is not selects, as the color of their own eyes. And to modify such preferences in a short period of time is almost impossible. It, like other individual characteristics of the baby, one can only assume, if possible, not thinking that a different set of features better.
There are children who are categorically not involved in the discos for young and not enduring the most talented animators. They hate big companies and birthdays in childrens clubs, but great feel and play with the same neighbor boy. All noisy and vigorous for them excessively.
And there’s other kids: not a problem for them to join in unfamiliar company, they are not lost and instantly make new friends on the playgrounds, game rooms, on the beach.
And some better than others, they’re just different. And you should not try to alter the child — you will only reduce his sense of self-confidence in rejecting the individual characteristics associated with communication. On the contrary it should teach the child to find words that reflect his character, for example: “you’re sociable” or “you need time to get used to the new children”. The kid is gonna think of such neatorama wording soon.